MM#316--Our Society Needs Hero Dads

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Welcome to the Theory to Action podcast, where we examine the timeless treasures of wisdom from the great books in less time, to help you take action immediately and ultimately to create and lead a flourishing life.

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Now here's your host, david Kaiser.

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Hello, I am David and welcome back to another Mojo Minute Now.

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Just last weekend not this past weekend, but the weekend before we posted in our members only section a full academy review of Hero being the Strong Father your Children Need by Dr Meg Meeker.

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It's a captivating book.

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I highly encourage you to check it out.

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If you haven't checked out our special pricing for the monthly membership, be sure to do that.

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But I wanted to share some things that we weren't able to cover in that review just because of time and space, because, again, it's a captivating book and it speaks to this social and societal ill that absolutely needs to be talking about, and I've been pondering this epidemic that doesn't get nearly enough of the clickbait headlines that we are all accustomed to these days in major media, and that pandemic is the crisis of absent fathers.

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Here's just some statistics that are the latest in this silent pandemic.

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Across America, 2022 data indicates there are approximately 18.3 million children who live without a father in the home, comprising about one in four US children.

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About 80% of single-parent homes are twice as likely to suffer from mental health and behavioral problems as those living with married parents.

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In one study, 70% of youth in state-operated facilities were from single-parent homes.

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Children with an actively engaged father perform much better in school, are much better in school.

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Some data shows that they are 33% less likely to repeat a class and 43% more likely to get A's in school.

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In a study of 56 school shootings, only 10 of the shooters 18% were raised in a stable home with two both biological parents.

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82% grew up in either an unstable family environment or grew up without both biological parents together.

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Now these statistics come to us from the American First Policy Institute, but they are closely followed by the folks at the National Center for Fathering and the National Fatherhood Initiative, which are all good outfits, good people trying to help out society again with this silent pandemic.

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So that brings us back to our book Hero Dad by Dr Meg Meeker.

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Now this book has riveting insights and that's part of the reason we covered this in the Academy Review.

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But Dr Meeker opens her book with these words Every child needs a hero dad.

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And I mean who could and who would contest that?

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Our kids look up to dads with eyes full of wonder.

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They see us as larger-than-life figures.

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But what does it mean to be a hero dad?

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It's not about superhuman strength or having all the answers.

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That's the misconception.

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And here's the nugget of wisdom being a hero, dad is all about showing up, being present and offering a guiding light.

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She writes quote great fathering is the most untapped resources to turn our kids and our culture around.

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Is this ringing any bells for you?

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Throughout the book Hero, dr Meeker weaves together clinical experience, research and personal stories to highlight the profound impact the fathers do have in boosting confidence and shaping character.

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And isn't character what we're all lacking in our society today?

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In fact, take this gem of a quote when fathers are present and strong, they can help guide their children to make wise choices.

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Now, speaking of wise choices, tim Gogolin over at the Federalist has, or had, a great article.

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It was about a year and a half ago and I stumbled back across it and I wanted to share some of his insights.

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Here is what he says and I'll put a link in the show notes to this article so you can check it out for yourself.

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But let's go to the article to hear his insights.

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But according to the report, many fatherless boys are even struggling to achieve the most minimal level of educational attainment, a high school degree which allows them to enter equipped for the workforce.

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These young men are directionless, or, as Wilcox and his colleagues write, the daily life of these men is often marked by hours in front of screens, vaping, smoking marijuana and are under the influence of some other kind of substance.

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They are not contributors, but instead bystanders.

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Secondly, our society pays a trap plays.

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Play pays a tragic price.

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According to the ifs brief and you this is.

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This is linked in the article young men who grew up without a biological father are nearly twice as likely to be idle compared to those who grew up with an actively involved dad.

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In addition, they have significant anger issues, which leads to legal problems, as fatherless boys are about twice as likely to have spent some time in jail before they reach the age of 30.

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Is it not a coincidence that the tragedies of Columbine, sandy Hook, buffalo and Uvalde are all tied to angry young men?

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So, for all the talk about gun laws and gun restrictions, it seems to me that we are missing the real issue here as a society.

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This is the root of the problem.

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Kids with hands-on dads pick up the compass that life is tricky to navigate, but having a dad there to help you navigate it makes things a little bit easier.

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Now you might be thinking what about dads who struggle with self-doubt and don't know how to step up to the plate?

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Well, the good news is there are other men out there, good men who, when you ask those questions how did you handle this situation?

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Or how do you handle that situation you will get the help from other men.

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And this book is another great value and another great avenue.

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There are many great books out there.

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We're actually probably in the golden age of books.

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Books are readily available Digital, audio, written, the physical books so there's tons of information that you can seek out.

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While not all dads are perfect and there are some that are far from perfect, but a father in the home still makes a major difference in the development of a boy into a man, and a good father, in most cases who invests in his son or his daughter, ends up developing into a successful man or a successful daughter.

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In fact, the same study.

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Going back to the article, if we wish to revive the fortunes of today's young men, we must help fathers teach their sons how to prepare better for adulthood relationships and marriage.

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These steps matter not just for renewing the fortunes of young men, but also for the sake of women too, to have good partners to love, to marry, to start families in the future.

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And here's where Gogolin concludes in the article.

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If we want a society of successful men who do not lash out in anger, who love and cherish their families and are good citizens, those who are fathers must realize that it is our responsibility to pass on those values to our sons.

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If we are absent or distant, we do not only do a disservice to the boys, but also to women and society.

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If we take fatherhood seriously, we can raise a generation of boys that have no holes in their soul, and future generations will be better for it.

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Completely agree with Mr Gogolin.

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We have a generation of men without a purpose and I'm not sure they are entirely to blame.

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We fathers have not stepped up to the blade in this generation to raise good men and we should be blaming absent fathers.

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We've never seen a generation with so many absent fathers.

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In fact, it is for sure a silent epidemic with so many absent fathers.

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In fact, it is for sure a silent epidemic.

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Now, with all that being said, here's why Dr Meeker's book is super good and where it really hits home, because she offers a heart-wrenching truth that we have so many children growing up without that father figure.

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That it's quote.

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It's not always about the physical absence, it can be emotional too.

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So again, it's not always about being physically absent, you can be emotionally absent too.

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That's another nugget of wisdom.

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Fathers can get caught up in the hustle and bustle of life providing for the family, which is a good thing, but they could be missing the magic and the milestones.

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Now, folks, our children, are thirsting for father's involvement like a parched land soaks up the rain.

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And we can bridge that gap.

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Now, check out this book, check out this quote from the book In the sea of busyness, it's the lifeline of prioritized parenting that rescues us, meeker, encourages.

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See, she's not preaching the message of unreachable perfection.

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And this book can be the tender nudge for us to realign our priorities, to commit to those moments that seem so small but they etch deep in the memories of our children and of our children's hearts.

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So let me ask you are you engaging with your children?

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Are you engaging with the world changers of tomorrow?

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Are you answering those late night questions about the stars, about life, about love, about why the sky is blue?

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Because, my dear friends, that's where the heroism of the hero dad begins, that's where hero dads are made.

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So in today's Mojo Minute let's appreciate on the dads that are staying involved.

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Let's appreciate the fathers who are stepping up day in and day out.

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And if you are a father and you see men stepping up into the gap, give them a pat on the back, give them a knuckle bump, because they're helping out society.

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But if you see men that are shrinking from that responsibility, that are not standing in the breach for their children, say something.

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Encourage the dad.

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We need more encouragement of our fathers God knows they're not getting it from our society.

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Of our fathers God knows they're not getting it from our society.

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So let's all put down our phones long enough to observe what's happening around us, that we as a side society are struggling with this silent epidemic.

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And remember the kids don't expect perfection, they expect presence.

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There's a hero inside each of of us.

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It's time to step into those shoes.

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Maybe you're not leaping the tall buildings like superman, but trust me, you are shaping the future.

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One bedtime story, one heartfelt chat and one shared laugh at a time, and that is living a flourishing life.

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Thank you for joining us.

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We hope you enjoyed this Theory to Action podcast.

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Be sure to check out our show page at teammojoacademycom, where we have everything we discussed in this podcast, as well as other great resources.

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Until next time, keep getting your mojo on.

MM#316--Our Society Needs Hero Dads

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