MM#25--Perfectionism

Hello, I’m David and welcome back to another MOJO minute.

Today lets talk perfectionism.

I have spoken in the past about my perfectionism and how it is a short coming of mine.

In fact, in the past you will know how much i love this book “How to be an imperfectionist” by Stephen guise.  The new way to self-acceptance, fearless living and freedom from Perfectionism.

Hey, I thought it was so good that i wanted share another great point from the book.   

So if you (currently are) or you know that you are a recovering perfectionist, these little nuggets of imperfection you will appreciate greatly!

As always lets begin with a quote  from the book, 

“I’ve analyzed and narrowed down what I believe are the five most important areas of perfectionism in terms of how ‘core’ they are to the concept and how ‘fixable’ they are. When we start throwing imperfect punches at perfectionism, these will be our targets...:”

Then he systematically list them along with ways to “fix” them

Here’s the list:

•  Unrealistic expectations

•  Rumination

•  Need for approval 

•  Concern over mistakes 

•  Doubts about actions” 

(And if you dont mind, lets take a dive into the deep end of the pool on each of these points.). 

Dont worry we will quickly address each problem with a simple solution and the mindset needed to approach each one.

First up on our list, unrealistic expectations.

Stephen offers many solutions but i think the best is to quit being attached to the end product or the result.   And just get after it.  We have talked several times in this podcast about thinking vs doing.   So if you find yourself obsessing on the final outcome, change your thinking and get after “the doing aspect”.  The results will work themselves out.

Second, rumination.

Lets Define rumination.   Now a quick Siri question to define rumination brings up this definition = a deep or considered thought about something.

Hmmm…that seems a bit off.   I would add to that definition that often rumination has a negative connection to it.  

Stephen tells us the solution is to quit overthinking on things you can’t control and will never be able to control.  Aka the weather.  

Moving on, we come to number 3.

Need for approval.   

This is big one for many because they tie their self-worth to others opinions.   

The solution is to untie their opinions of you to your own self worth.   Everyone is worthy.   If you are a human being you are worthy.  After all all of us are made in the image and likeness of God.   Furthermore, whatever your concept of your creator, when you break away from caring about others opinions of you there is great freedom and your work and your attitude will become even better.

Number 4.

Concerns over mistakes.

Now this is my big bugaboo.  

I had and still have from time to time have a severe shortcoming over making mistakes.   

Stephen instills in us the solution of learning to embrace mistakes.  They are part of life.  There was only one perfect person who walked the earth and guess what, David…you ain’t him.   So get over it.  Lol

So I keep this book close by on my bookshelf and occasionally I still grab it to read and reread his section on overzealousness on making mistakes.  

Good stuff right there.

Finally, number 5, doubts about actions.

I found this part of the book refreshing because it is perfectly aligns with other books we have reviewed.  (I love when that happens)

Stephen explains to us, “you should measure your success in the little things getting accomplished vs. the big things”

Think about our MOJO book reviews, Atomic habits, Eat that Frog and Failing Forward are some quick ones that come to mind.  Be sure to check those beauties out if you are feelin it.

So in todays MOJO minutes, two questions:

Are you perfectionist or do you suffer from some tendencies in perfectionism?

And whats the one item from this list that resonates with you and how will you combat it today?

Remember put theory 2 action.

Minute to minute to minute and moment to moment to moment.

Dont worry about making mistakes.   They will happen.   

Lets do this anyway no matter the imperfections!!