MM#133--Habits of Happiness

Welcome to the theory to action podcast, where we examine the timeless treasures of wisdom from the great books in less time to help you take action immediately, and ultimately to create and lead a flourishing life. Now, here's your host, David Kaiser.

Hello, I'm David and welcome back to another Mojo minute. In our last two Mojo minutes, we talked about the howl of happiness and the happiness setpoint found from the excellent book written by Sonya Lieber Amir ski, and we discussed how our country and its culture is getting increasingly secular. And how this question of the howl of happiness or happiness just in general is super critical, especially in our culture. And most especially in the last three years, when the whole world, including our country went nuts. And everyone is extremely unhappy. So to get us back on the right track, let's go back to our pie chart found in sanyas book the howl of happiness, a new approach to getting the life you want. And let's remember our pie chart. Remember, we have 40% of indicated with intentional activity, the happiness setpoint is indicated with 50%. And circumstances are indicated with 10%. So in the books on your provides incredible studies about identical twins separated at birth, which helps us shine a light on that 50% mark of our happiness determined by genetics, and that all of us have a happiness set point that 50% It's kind of like a gravitational point or a gravitational level, we tend to hover towards all the time, because of our genetics. So that is the 50%. And that's pretty much fixed, we really can't do anything about that. So we, let's, let's check mark that we got it. Okay, and then there's the 10% of the happiness pie chart that is led by our circumstances. 

And this is where our culture gets drastically wrong. Our culture screams at the top of its lungs every day at us saying, if you just increase your wealth, you will be happy. Well, that's wrong. That's a counterfeit. That is not true. Then our culture says, if you just increase your attractiveness, your outward beauty. For the guys, it's the six pack abs. And shame on me, because I bought into that fraud for about five years. But that's a huge counterfeit as well. And for the women, it's the Beachbody. That's a fraud to another huge counterfeit. We will not achieve happiness, even if we reach those things, not that they're bad in and of themselves. And we can get into that later. 

But we know our circumstances based on tons of research, which Sonya provides in this book only accounts for 10% of the happiness. So let's sum up 50% is fixed and 10%. accounts to our circumstances. And those two barely move the needle. So what about this 40% this intentional activity, as Sonya calls it? Well, let's go back to the book. What makes up this 40%. Besides our genes and the situations that we confront, there is one critical thing left our behavior. Thus, the key to happiness lies not in changing our genetic makeup which is impossible, and not in changing our circumstances, seeking wealth or attractiveness, or better colleagues, which is usually impractical, but in our daily intentional activities. With this in mind, our pie chart illustrates the potential of the 40% that is within our ability to control the 40% for the room to maneuver for opportunities to increase or decrease our happiness levels, through what we do in our daily lives, and how we think and have quote Ah, this is what the 40% is all about. And somewhere, Sonya says, they were about to she was about to call the book The 40% solution instead of the howl of happiness.

Because this is where all the work that needs to be done lies. Remember our catchphrase? There is no happiness without action. So let's keep that in mind. And let's go back to the book. It may be obvious that to achieve anything substantial in life, like learn a profession, master a sport, raise a child, a good deal of effort is required. But many of us find it difficult to apply the notion of effort to our emotional or mental lives without effort, we might get lucky. But like a long forgotten New Year's resolution, the success will be short lived. Consider how much time and commitment many people devote to physical exercise, whether it's going to the gym, jogging, kickboxing, or yoga. My research reveals that if you desire greater happiness, you need to go about it in a similar way. In other words, becoming lastingly happier demands, making some permanent changes that require effort, and commitment every day of your life. pursuing happiness takes work. But consider that this happiness work may be the most rewarding work you'll ever do. And End of quote. 

Wow, that is a fan tastic super nugget of wisdom. Right? They're happiness work. How about those apples? Super good stuff right there by Sonya. In fact, I'm loving, loving loving this book. How can you not get fired up hearing that we can improve our happiness level? This is just fantastic. You will want to get this book. It's that good. Let's go back for another coup de gras quote from the book this comes to us from from part two of the book where Sonya details, the happiness activities. I call them habits because I think that's what they really are. But let's give the full list of them. Here's the 12 Happiness activities that Sonya describes in detail in part two of her book there number one expressing gratitude. Number two, cultivating optimism. Number three, avoiding overthinking and social comparison. Number four, practicing acts of kindness. Number five, nurturing social relationships. Next, developing strategies for coping, seven, learning to forgive eight, increasing flow experiences, nine Savior savoring life's joys, number 10, committing to your goals. Number 11. practicing religion and spirituality. And number 12, the 12 Happiness activity that Sonya discusses in detail in part two of her book The howl of happiness. Number 12 is taking care of your body, meditation plus physical activity plus acting a happy person and of quote. So this is a very good list. And like I said, Tanya goes into each one of these throughout the second part of the book. 

Let's go to our final two quotes. Because this is this is where she really brings it together. Going back to the book, philosophers, writers in great grandmother's of times paths have long extolled the virtues of the three happiness activities I described here, expressing gratitude, cultivating optimism and avoiding overthinking and social comparison. Such exhortations as try to be more optimistic. Don't dwell on it too much. And you'd feel better if you were more appreciative have been around for generations. So what makes them important for us today? Why should we spend Why should you spend your valuable time and energy and learning them and turning them into habits? Furthermore, how do we know first that these habits or even learn a bowl as opposed to being inborn And second, that even if you could train yourself to do them, you would be happier.

The answers to those questions are found within these pages. And I have selected for this book only those activities from among many that have been shown to be successful through science and conjecture rather than conjecture. And she, she goes on. What's more, I describe why these strategies work and how precisely they should be implemented to maximize their effectiveness. using evidence from the latest research, and every grandmotherly bit of advice lies a kernel of truth. I have chosen the biggest kernels established what the data show and sought to determine for whom these truths might work best, and how and why apply these activities to your own life and you will harness the promise of the 40% solution. For such as the amount of wiggle room, you have to remake yourself, and have quote, who, yah Hoo yah hoo, ya. That is another great super nugget of wisdom from Sonya. 

So in today's Mojo minute, let us begin to ingrain into our habits, this way of thinking, expressing gratitude, cultivating optimism, and avoiding overthinking and social comparison. And just doing these three habits, or happiness activities, as Sonya calls them, and just doing these three habits of happiness, we will be well on our way to happiness as Sonya reminds us, we will be well on our way to happiness. And in fact, we will be well on our way to happiness, and a flourishing life. And a little a PS here never forget, there is no happiness without action. So let us put theory into action and create a flourishing one.

Thank you for joining us. We hope you enjoyed this theory to action podcast. Be sure to check out our show page at Team Mojo academy.com where we have everything we discussed in this podcast as well as other great resources. Until next time, keep getting your mojo on